Monday, October 10, 2011

Queen of Mean

I'm afraid to admit that, at times, I have been called the Queen of Mean.

My college roommate (and best friend) coined the phrase. I can't remember the exact catalyst, but it had something to do with the fact that I found (find) it quite funny when people are startled, or trip, or are fooled in outrageous ways. Please note, I do NOT find it funny if someone is actually hurt by being startled, tripping or fooled. That's just not nice.

But, for example, I think these photos taken by a hidden camera at a haunted house are hilarious.

I know I should probably feel very bad about thinking these faces of frightened people are funny. But, I don't. Queen of Mean, remember.

But, when it comes to being the Queen of Mean as a mother, that's another story. I learned my lesson six years ago when I made my 7 year-old cry.

I didn't mean to make her cry. It just sort of happened. It's all because, as the Queen of Mean, I'm also a sore winner. I'm a perfectly fine loser. In fact, it hardly phases me to lose a game. It just spurs me on to play again. But winning can be bad. I love playing games. And I love to win.

My daughter, husband and I were playing a game - Blokus I think - when suddenly I beat the pants off the two of them. Whoo Hoo! I was dancing and singing. I might have been singing a rendition of "We are the Champions" by Queen, but it sounded more like:

"I am the Champion! And you are the losers!"

I know. Bad, isn't it.

Anyway, my daughter started to cry. (Do you blame her?) And I suddenly realized how mean the Queen of Mean could actually be.

I apologized profusely and really meant it. I said I made a big mistake and wouldn't do it again. And I've tried very hard. When I win, I'm happy. But I don't make a giant deal out of it. (Maybe in my head I make a little deal out of it.) But I certainly don't say, "And you are the losers!" That would be mean.

That was six years ago and every once in awhile my daughter brings it up. I guess it made a big impression on her. And maybe she's giving me little reminders to keep the Queen of Mean in check.


  1. Two words for your bad winning spirit: Sister Bear.

    Tabitha and Griffin (our 4 and 7 year olds, respectively) love the Berenstain Bears. We have read "No Girls Allowed" many times in the past six months (MANY times!) Sister does a victory dance and war whoops when she wins, and it leads to trouble.

    I think the Queen of Mean needs to hit the library...

  2. Uh Oh. Sister Bear and I have something in common. I'll have to check out the book.